What I was Feeling When I Read Gatsby's Letter on the day of my Wedding

A day has not passed that I have not missed Gatsby. I miss his smile, his voice, and everything about him. I am getting married today, but I still feel as if Gatsby is the one I should be with. I do love Tom, if I did not, I would not be getting ready to marry him. However, there is a part of me that makes me feel like I am doing the wrong thing. In that letter, I felt like Gatsby was there, lying next to me again, whispering in my ear how much he loves me. Is it right to leave this man for Tom? Am I just forcing myself to love Tom as a replacement for Gatsby? What Gatsby and I had five years ago was real love. The true love that you read about in story books and that every little girl fantasizes over. I have not lost these feelings for Jay, this letter, just reminded me of what it was like to stand next to be with him. I miss him. Is it fair to Tom for me to marry him when I still am in love with Gatsby? Jay is still out there, waiting for me, yet I am the one moving on even though I am still in love. Why must I love two different men? I should have not fell in love with Tom. Gatsby is the one that I want to be with, but maybe, by marrying Tom, this love will take over. Maybe Tom will be better than Gatsby for me in the end, there is only one way to find out.